The Peterson Family

The Peterson Family

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Here we go again...

I have a doctors appointment scheduled for a week from Thursday. We are going to try the IUI again (unless the doc suggests something different I guess). I'm just praying it works. I'm terrified of having to go the IVF route, not because it's really not fun (which it isn't), but mostly because we are no where near in the financial situation to be able to afford that. Also, I'm trying to prepare myself for the hormonal ups and downs, not so excited about that. Wish us luck. I'll let you know.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012


Due to our doctor being out of town (on a well deserved vacation) we will be putting off the baby stuff till May. It's actually kind of nice because I just don't have to worry about it right now. I'm also working quite a bit more the later half of this month, so it will be good to not have the stress of the constant doctor's visits as well, not to mention the costs.

My good news is that for the first time in almost 5 months we are going to be able to make our house payment without having to dig into savings/baby money (which there really isn't much of, but we are trying), it will all come from Tyson's and mine new jobs, it sounds like a small thing, but it's huge to us. We really don't like needing help and being dependent on others, I think that has been the hardest part of lack of income. We still aren't making enough to really be on our feet, but we are getting there and I'm so excited about that. I seriously can't wait till we are self-sufficient again. I can't say how much we have appreciated the help we have received and I can't wait till we can pay back those that have helped us.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

General Conference

After we found out we really weren't pregnant I asked Tyson for a blessing. It just felt like everything was falling apart in my life. I wasn't pregnant, my back is falling to pieces, Tyson's car just keeps breaking down, he's hardly getting any hours at work. Everything was just piling up. The blessing talked about about paying special attention to conference, that there would be something for me in every talk, some more than others, so I was trying very hard to pay special attention today, then came Elder Holland's talk, and I cried through the whole thing. First with the parable of the workers and their equal pay, and then when he talked about envy. I'm fairly sure envy is my greatest sin. It's been so hard for me to see all of my siblings dreams coming true, and so many pregnant friends. Everytime someone brings one of these things up I just want to cry, its not that I don't wish them well, but I'm sad for us. I keep getting told to be grateful for those things that I do have. I actually hate when people say this, because it's like they are saying I'm not, and I'm so incredibly grateful, I just don't feel complete. I know there are people that are supposed to be in my family and they aren't here yet and I don't really imagine being content until they are, in the meantime, its just so hard waiting for them. Anyways, the gist is I'm going to try harder to not be envious. I don't deserve to hurt everytime someone has something good happen. Some day things will balance out and we will get our full pay. I feel so much for those in that parable that wanted to be working and then just not getting this job or that job. It's been our lives for months now. We finally have jobs, but they don't cover the bills. I'm just trying to have faith that things will work out. I'm praying for it everyday and every night. For those children that I know are supposed to be part of our family. For jobs that will be able to support the family that we have as well as the one we want. For things to just be a little bit better, and for me to not want to cry everytime someone tells me they are pregnant or a family member talks about how much money they are spending just for the heck of it and how hard it is for them. It will get better, it has to.